One really is the loneliest number………

Do you know why I come here everyday, even when I posts nothing new?

I come because I want to see how many people read about me today. It’s my pathetic attempt to be social. I exist only to pay bills and other than work, I have no outside communication. So here,I come.

My mother is in love, so she has no time…not that she listens to me anyway.  My ex…well frankly I’ve beat that dead horse, dug it up & beat it so more…so she goes about her life oblivious to me. And “her”….that’s a horse I’d like to beat, turn into glue & then use it to glue religious pamphlets in foreign countries so she is constantly being exorcised.

So other than these words, I have no connection with anything. Sad when you think about. I mean this is actually not communicating. This is me beinga hypocrite and whining about my life and you my poor, dear reader being forced to realize your life isn’t that bad…maybe. You know I don’t even talk to me. Well lately I’ve started to, but generally I simply walk about my house in silence. It used to be that if I talked aloud I would start to cry because I’d realize just how pathetic I really am….talking to no one. But now the tears come all on their own, no matter I’m doing. I have even managed to wake myself up crying actual tears.

I suppose that’s a sign I should heed, but I simply don’t care anymore. What could I do about it anyway? 😐

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