Another year has rolled by and I am alone as usual. I digress, I am not just alone…but I am lonely. 
Funny thing is, one day last week a woman at work was talking about those of us who live alone. According to her logic, by living alone “we learn more about ourselves…we have time to think”. 
Well here’s what I have learned… I have learned that the longer I am alone, the more critical I become of others. While I used to talk about people, it was with my ex and we would laugh as we said crazy things..well since I have no one to talk to, my comments are being more mean and less amusing. I no longer envy people with their “loved ones”, now I see them as wasteful heathens with blatant disregard for anyone but themselves. 
I have learned that having someone to talk to is not important if the TV works, besides they would probably not want to hear about whatever I’m whining about today. 
I have learned that if given enough time, I could in fact pluck every single hair from my body. Trust me, on this one….I’ve tried and there is never enough time. 
I have learned that I eat an exorbitant amount of cereal… I think I single-handedly keep soy bean farmers afloat. 
I have learned that the things I have learned are stupid….I would rather live with someone who loved me as I loved them, with all my heart and soul. But since they do not exist…I have learned that my life still sucks. 
I have, however, started the wheels of my bankruptcy in motion. No, I am still not ok with it..but it’s not like I have a choice. The nice lady I spoke with made it seem like all would be right in my world soon, but 5 years is a long time….so we’ll see. 
As is standard, I will be at work for the Holidays instead of with my loving family. Oh wait, what loving family? Hell, for that matter what family? Don’t get me wrong. I know I am blessed (as I’ve stated many posts before). Right now there are so many millions without jobs or homes or a prayer. Right here where I work, there so many people without any sort of “good” in their lives that it would break my heart if I still had one. There is a woman who just found out she may have colon cancer, another woman whose husband may be dying, a woman who used to work here is currently in the hospital, and of course “her” father is dying (again). So I understand that my problems are minuscule in the grand scheme of problems, but nonetheless they are still there, so whatever.
http://www.last.fm/music/The+Emotions/_/What+Do+the+Lonely+Do+at+Christmas
